Grief and Loss

Merriam-Webster says of “bereave: to deprive of something; (2): to take away, especially by force.”

The experience of loss is an inevitable part of every human journey. The response to a loss may happen soon after the event or be delayed, even for many years. The loss may be so severe, so traumatic, that it takes time for our heart to step into accepting the reality of it.

Grief is the emotional body’s way of trying to “catch up” with what the brain knows. It is such an individual experience that no one can really tell anyone exactly how to grieve. And because the process of grieving is so intensely personal, so must be the care and treatment of it. It is a profound transition into another world. So, as it appears, we find that that there are really not discrete, orderly “stages” of grief that everyone passes through, as previously thought. There is however, commonality of experience: denial and emotional “numbing”; sadness and often crying, anger and irritability, helplessness, confusion and fear, and even relief. These experiences are common among all human beings.

While this sounds a lot like the symptoms in my paragraph on counseling clinical depression, and while there may be an accompanying component of depression, grief is different. And it makes no distinction between genders, races or culture. I find that if there is any good news about the process of grieving, it is this: there are those “sign posts” that can indicate and assure that the bereft is on the right track to grief’s passing and resolution. More, those sign posts can be used by a “guide”, your therapist, who may also have had deep experiences of grief to help you quicken or ease the process.

No one should have to grieve alone.  I have learned so much from my own experiences of deep grief. They have taught me the way of gently “easing” through a process that is quite natural, and quite contrary to our cultural fear of this process.  So I offer a vessel within which, in your own way, you can ease through your own grief.  Here, release your grief safely, and even embrace the humanity of your mourning.